Personality Crisis – A Monologue

Personality Crisis – A Monologue

No,
I don’t know what you mean by that
I’m confused, to be honest
Me? hiding....?
Hahahaha! Can you believe that?!
Whatever that means anyway,
But do you even know me?
Now I’m not talking about patient-doctor knowing
If you know what I mean.
No?
Well, I can categorically say I am a happy person
Forget whatever we have been dragging all this while
Nothing is wrong with me!
Have you met my friend? No?
Have you heard my jokes?
Hahahaha... you should see my twitter followers and IG pictures
It is weird how we are talking about a non-existing problem
Whatever gave you the idea that I, Annabelle is hiding behind a mask lol
Weird flex lol
Yes, I laugh a lot
No, it’s not weird to laugh a lot
Don’t go all psychological on me, please
It’s all because I am a happy, jovial person
Contrary to popular belief *rolls eyes*
You just have to see me with friends
And family....that too lol
Childhood?
Well, childhood was childhood, nothing spectacular
No, I don’t remember most of it
It must be somewhere in my mind.
It’s not a big deal, not everyone will remember
How they run around butt naked
Or how they go hours without meals.
Well, I’m all right now yeah?
Happy outgoing girl with her
Smile-spilling photographs on social media
Living her perfectly cut out life.
So tell me what could be wrong?


******************************
Hello...
Hi.....
Don’t look around, I’m right here
yes, it’s me, Annabelle,
Why do you always shut me out?
I made you who you are!
Painted the picture, giving you the courage to be who you are
Made the mask you have on
You had fun, partying with friends
Laughing, having a good time
Forgetting who made you.
Well, until you are alone at twilight
Alone with the thoughts
Why do I deserve the tears?
The rants, the heartaches
The burden of making the next day perfect.
All you said were forgotten is right here with me
I’m the one with the demons
The one who fights the dragons of the past away
The pain, the anxiety, the fear, the depression
You shoved them down my throat
So your social life could be deemed perfect.
Let’s talk about the childhood that was just childhood
Have you forgotten?
The pain of a failed childhood
Where you saw hunger in slideshows
A childhood filled with wants in fivefold
Where clothes were once in a year
And eating was twice a day
I could go on or stop
If you think nothing is wrong


****************************
She could be right
Or maybe they could be wrong
But definitely not me
Given that they are expecting a diagnose
From me, I laugh in Swahili
I can’t keep a straight face
The way they are looking at me
Oh lord save me from this lunatic
Or lunatics!
“Who are you really?”
“the girl behind the mask or the one with the mask?”
“You need to pick a personality, Annabelle ”
Is the question even sensible?
Of course, it’s not!
She just looked away from me
But one of them is looking at me
Or I’m looking at her!
I can’t even say at this point
I should give a diagnosis
Probably send her to the head psychiatric
Geez, they are both watching me now!
Okay, this is creepy
Do something, Annabelle!!!!!

Title - Personality Crisis
Name- Amineshi Miracle
State code- os/19c/0399
School - University of Benin
Course of study - theatre arts